Unfortuately, I’m nominating my own town.
It’s by far not the worst infected place by the sub culture that is chav-ism, but I feel I have to add my bit here.
Estates such as Thornhill, Lordshill, Totton, Northam, Shirley and Millbrook should all have a mention as they are all important to my story.
Basically, there is no place in the UK that is tinged with Chavs. Things have got so bad in some places that they have employed security guards outside newsagents (One Stop) and small supermarkets (Somerfield, Co-Op etc). What on earth is the UK coming to? Society appears to be capitualting!
I awake more or less every morning from my suburb home for a bus journey that takes around 40 minutes into the centre of town to my workplace.
Just one day can mean several accounts with Chavs and chav activity.
On the bus, you can see (from a safe distance) the smashed bus stops, glass everywhere, and bins burnt completely by last nights congregation of lowlifes and their activities – and guess who’s paying for their mess? Yep, the good people, the taxpayers.
Anyway, about 2 years ago – we had enough – we started taking things into our own hands and formed a mini rebellion against these skanks.
One form of action was to circulate pikey areas such as those above and pelt eggs (bought in large quantities) at them, and let me tell you, there is nothing better than seeing a group of chavs s**tting themselves as several eggs pummel their very positions – and, lets face it, minimal chance of collateral damage when you’ve got so many targets to choose from!
But anyway, where isn’t their a town not suffering with scourge of these horrid beings? Having read most accounts on this site so far, its absolutely startling the amount of similarities there are with their dress senses, postures and interests.
They all seem to hang around outisde Newsagents at night – like flies around s**t, for some reason, causing minor disturbances and frightening good natured people in large numbers.
Their dress sense – why the f**k would anyone think they look smart in that clobber? The only time I wear sports gear is when I’m bumming around the house or playing sports – but that seems to be their ‘going out attire’.
McDonalds – what is it with that place that attracts them? Maybe its low class food for low class people, I don’t know, but to venture into one you’d think you’d just walked into a prison sponsored by JJB sports. Unruly, uncouth little irks as young as ten spurting foul mouthed tirades at their friends and other customers before they are either thrown out or get bored and decide to go vandalise yet another bus stop or something.
Can someone tell me where this blatant disregard for normal social interaction comes from?
During the daytime, you can find alot of the younger chavs residing in the Sega Arcade in the Bargate Shopping Centre. This is where they will witter away the last of Mummies/Daddies benefits on mind numbing arcade games and, if the evade the security guard, a flutter on some of the gambling machines, before, most probably, returning to/outside McDonald’s again for the remainder of the day.
And when they are old enough to get into the many drinking hotspots in the town, they tend to descend on the same places – thankfully not infecting the decent nightspots for the decent people. However, if you’re a ‘pint and a fight’ man, I suggest you try McClusky’s or Leisure World for the chav club scene or one of the many highstreet bars – your bound to find a few chavs round that way, more than likely being thrown out by the bouncers or being carted off by the Police after yet another unprovoked attack on decent citizens.
And, if you want to definitely be sure of seeing a pikey contingent, another good bet is to come along to the many fair’s the city holds – no chav would miss a fair that gives them the opportunity to win fake buberry by hooking ducks!
The woman – ohhh dear. Immedietely, the term ‘Traceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey!’ comes to mind. They are insistent on wearing fake gold jewellery, ridiculously hooped earrings and sports leggings, sometimes baggy jumpers to disguise the fact they’ve been knocked up by Scott/Tyrone/Lee/Ricky/Can’t remember.
But it’s the guys that crack me up the most – don’t they know that ‘normal’ people laugh at them? I mean, for starters, pick any chav group in the UK and you won’t be able to tell the difference between them and Blazin’ Squad.
It pains me to say it aswell, and, I don’t like calling people ugly but, f**k me, they are so ugly aswell. Who or what the f**k breeds these gruesome monstrosities? Are they cross breeds? In Breds? Goofy, spotty, snarling mini ogres dressed like AllSports mannequins. And what’s with the white socks tucked into the tracksuit bottoms?
Their existence is a double edged sword for me – for starters, if they didn’t exist, I’m sure I’d have alot more money for myself not having to pay for their families, Argo’s runs and vandalism – on the other hand, I’d have nothing to laugh at.
Foul Mouthed, Ugly, non contributing arseholes – most unredeemable to put back into a normal social circle, no matter how good a ‘life coach’ you could employ. Can we have a cull now, please?
Pm me to join the Universal Anti-Chav Alliance! (UACA)