St Helens – it really is grim up north!
Well where do you start with St Helens? The whole town is now infested with chav scum. Not a day goes by when you don’t see a Burberry wearing, bling bling scumbag, with Rockport boots and a Freddy Krueger striped jumper.
If you go to their natural breeding grounds, mainly Thatto Heath and Parr you’ll see baby chav scum – the new breed. Wearing baby knuckle dusters cleverly disguised as sovereign rings, with names like Chantelle and Kylie. Their mothers are no better with their chenille bright pink all in one rompa suits, fake tans and cropped tops, usually saying something insightful on them like ‘fcuk everyone’, but only fake fcuk obviously. Said tops are usually displaying their fat, stretched marked, belly pierced stomachs. Yuck.
Right lets start with nightclubs – Nexus the resident hunting ground for the chavs is a sight to behold on a Saturday night, you just need Richard Attenborough to narrate, around 11pm all tanked up with cheap cider the chav girls arrive, they hit the dance floor immediately, in the wild this would be the lake where the animals bathed, obviously being chavs they do not purchase a single drink mainly because their family allowance doesn’t stretch to it but also because they rely on the hunter chavs to provide for them.
An hour or so later the clones sorry chavs arrive, full of provido and ready to catch and obviously impregnate their mate – it doesn’t take long for them to infiltrate the dancefloor and knock other law abiding, decent folk off the dancefloor because if you blink or direct an eyeball in their direction then your likely to get a sovereign ring imprint on your face. Chav girls are immediately drawn to the boys through the smell they give off, usually Burberry for men or some other knock off aftershave they managed to get from the Sunday car boot sale. 9 months later and they have a baby Charmaine and they are top of the housing list! Mission accomplished.
Mid week the chavs usually spend their time destroying bus stops, hiding in entries like vermin, throwing rocks at the moon, or sitting around in large groups in the parks, the chav boys sit around discussing world politics (how they wish their job seekers would increase) and basically put the fear of god into any one who walks past. Usually smaller groups of chavs hang around the local off licence or B & M (this is a great store that sells out of date food to chavs) and like a pack of wolves they descend on people and force them into the shop for their tipple – 10 litres of your cheapest cider please.
Although Nexus is the biggest hunting/mating area for scum they have now infiltrated most bars, the Dali bar for instance seems to be full of tiny chav scum, incredibly small girls much like Frodo from the Lord of the Rings, obviously stunted in growth as their mothers smoked 600 cheap fags a day during their pregnancy, this is a very popular scum bar along with the delights of the stinking of vomit bar – Chicago Rock. The girls in here dress like models, yep they model steel capped boots and balaclavas.
Town Centre by day is another thing and just shows how the whole town is being turned into a haven for scum. We have Greggs which the chavs love, this is situated right next to Mother Care and opposite Poundland, coincidence – I don’t think so. Although Greggs does have competition as a new shop in town now sells HOT TOAST, this has sent the devoid of brain cell chavs into a quandary, I mean – HOT TOAST……………..
The last weekend in June really does put the fear of god into all decent St Helens folk (some do exist), for it’s the St Helens Show, this is basically a scene out of braveheart where chavs turn on other chavs and a battle royal commences, oh they do have a fair too, Silcocks Death Fair as its known and no doubt this year a HOT TOAST stall. But the crème de la crème of scum do not appear till after dark, they come armed with maces and machetes and then hit the death fair. The common place for chavs to hang out and compare clothes and armoury is the Waltzer, again this is common breeding ground for the chavs and to see hundreds of chavs in one area – a sea of burberry and lacoste is really a sight to behold, chavs from far and wide come to see this natural annual occurrence.
All in all St Helens is a chav infested dump and I advise any decent citizen to leave, then we can build a dirty great big wall around the place and nuke the lot of them…………..
St Helens isn’t all bad if you avoid town, I was brought up in Island’s Brow and then Eccleston-which is quite pleasant actually.
All this Xenophobia is ridiculous, who cares who’s scousers and “wools” and everything in between anyway? Sad people who are looking for an identity perhaps? Get a grip and stop wasting your time!
I left St Helens and live in Manchester now. I can honestly say I miss “home”…sometimes. Cheaper and more efficient services like hairdressers, nicer doctors surgeries, fewer burglaries and people who actually speak to each other (unlike a big city)!
I worked in St Helens for a couple of years renovating council propeties so I really worked all over, Parr, Moss bank,Windle and Blackbrook to name a few so I have seen quite a bit of it and although it is not the greatest place in the world it is not the worst ,it has its fare share of smackheads,potheads,piss heads ,coke heads and thieves but once you have worked in Manchester you will be glad to get back to st helens.The one thing I have noticed about St helens is the amount of fat poeple ..if a survey was doen here it would probably be the fattest town in the uk with widnes not far behind and the amount of young poeple that have taken up smoking is unbelievable but as I said I have been to far worse areas.
One thing nobody has mentioned is that big statue on the old colliery (the dream) is it just me or does it look like a very rude mans part in full flow!!
Right am 13! I live in st helens parr because my mum and das split up when I was 6 my brother was 11&my other brother was12 we moved too parr becoz my mum couldn’t affordbour 5bedroom house in Warrington anymore!we live in a 4bedroom house&just for the record!My mums nit a chav who goes round wearing a track suite&tbh I don’t regret having too move too st helens yeah I still go school in warrington&that but I’ve met loads of really nice people&there mums&dads are well nice aswell&they pay there way in life! &tbh moving here was the best thing that ever happened! I bet your sad little man in his late 50s early 60s who sits there in a chair near the window&everytime you look out the kids are being disrespectful yeah! Well there’s no need to give everyone else a bad name.
@Huyton:
Anyone who thinks that Whiston or Prescot is a suburb of Liverpool is obviously not a real scouser. In fact, most people from Huyton don’t even think that (I guess you’re not really from there, you whopper).
It’s these horrible plastic uber-scousers from parts of Knowsley (= not Liverpool and never has been) and elsewhere that give the proper ones a bad name.
Someone who was really from Liverpool wouldn’t bother posting a message about an irrelevant town they lived miles away from. But deep down the likes of “Huyton” and the other plastic mongs who’ve posted on this thread are in deep denial about not being real scousers. This is where their fear and hatred of the dreaded “woolyback” comes from. They look at one and see a reflexion of themselves!
One of the most pleasing things I ever saw was one of these vile specimens getting “absolutely battered” in St.Helens by some rugby-playing meathead who took offence to being called a “fuckin’ wool” by this whiny, high-pitched little c**t. Unfortunately, these vermine don’t usually get involved in one-on-one fights, they are pack animals who prefer to “terrorise” an easy victim.
Anyway, I never thought I’d agree with a St.Helen chav, but a first time for everything =).
PS: Purple Aki has bummed all of the Parr Boyz..
Have I fell into some sort of time slip hear, the fuckin’ Cotton Mill Strikes, tell me mate, what the f**k do you know about the Cotton Mill Strikes. One think I agree with you about., Liverpool is full of pricks.
oh, and i forgot!
If you dont want to get put in A + E, dont come to someone elses town and strut around like you own the place, talkin down to everyone. Or you will get battered. “la”.
@ Huyton
Ignorant bastard! By the way, the term “wooly back” is arse backwards, since it was you horrible scouse pricks that broke the cotton mill strikes. And no one else.
Oh, and by the way, when since has anyone from Huyton been a scouser?
Yeh, yeh, St Helens can be a bit of a shithole at times, but Ive never seen bother round here for ages. Got started on twice last time I was in scouse land tho. Funny that, eh?
Nobody outside of liverpool wants to be a scouser. Intenalize that you arrogant fucks. Oh, and why is St helens full of scousers? why is every c**t moving out of liverpool into the surrounding towns? because its a shit hole by any chance?
St helens deserves to be nuked, f**king horrible woolyback bastards. Lick scousers arses to their face and bad mouth us behind our backs. I can honestly say I feel I have done the world a favour every time I have punched one of the scumbags. Never, ever come to Liverpool or the suburbs such as Whiston or Prescot, because they know, they will get absolutley battered.
I was going to comment on here an argue that St Helens is not actually that bad but having sat here and really thought about it. Actually it is. There are a few people who are decent and earn a living but a large majority are scroungers. They all have loads of kids because it pays to have lots of kids but then they can’t cope with them all. They are always either drunk, drugged up, or recovering from either or both. Then there kids go in care and if they get caught still claiming for all the kids that they have not now got. They then go on the social for depression an scrounge that way. With all their kids in care ready to make the next generation of messed up young people to start the cycle again. This is why the town is infested with no hope scroungers and it is all the governments fault for letting them do this. Giving them an easy life. So thank god Nick Clegg has got in and hopefully we can sort this mess of a town out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
wooley jumpers minority sports crap shops comedy accent no idenity no hope welcome to st helens. keep driving past and come to liverpool instead.
Tbh st.helens is NOT a dump i live in a 5 bed room house here we have some very good schools and public services and yes there are chavvy places in the town but there are chavvy places everywhere and its the people that make a place and there is a minority of chavs and the people who i socialise with from st.helens are lovely honest decent and tbh nothing close to chavvy .
i live in parr and agree it is a dump muhaha
I think the person who wrote about St Helens got it absolutely right, I’ve lived there and it really is something from a Lovecraftian nightmare. Until recently St Helens had the dubious honour of having the highest rate of inbreeding in Europe, i believe its only third now. This information comes from a reliable source, a friend who is a nurse in the area who has to deal with all the chave and chavettes. And for those above from St Helens criticising the original poster, have you know sense of irony ?
u fuckin nobhed ders no need 2 bring scousers into this just coz wools are inbred priks. ders a wooly over der over der wearin flares an greasy hair greasy hair 3 star jumper alfway up its bak ders a wooly wooly bak wool bak.
i think he/she does know St Helens , as they clearly know the exact markingof Greggs … I wonder what you he/she was doing in Greggs? Could he/she be a wannabe chav/ette seeking revenge?
exactly! aint wrong with st.h, we aint scousers n never will be, wish theyd all bog off back scouse land!!
n 4 whoever sed girls av fat bellys, with piercings n strech marks, i think not! obv u aint seen all the girls ere! i aint a statistic! so mayb open ur eyes! or even visit st. h! coz u obv dunno f all.
i cant believe that article on st helens, it isnt like that at all, obviously u av neva bin here b4! like ova ppl av sed the only chavvy place is parr, dont link the rest ov us 2 parrites! and FYI the st helens show is in july not june!
St Helens does have its problems we all know this. So if you move away to Uni, London etc, your doin your own shit and fair plays to that. I now live in Manchester, that also has its good and bad pionts. The thing is some comments made have been a dig at the less fortunate end of the bourgher and the thing is this.
Ye there are some wankers, real nasty bastards, but there are some real top people also, salt of the earth, funny as f**k and the most honest I have ever met.
I have been called for the way I dress cos I am a bit of an indie kid, but thats my choice I will get over it. The thing that upset me was when I was a kid my family moved to the posh end and kids at my new school made my life hell for the first year cos I was from tother end of town. But guess what I got over that too.
Fell the love x
sooooooooo true!!!!! lol everywhere u look u see mouldy lookin stains!!!!!!!!!
The thing i think rates St. Helens chavs abov most is that theyve managed to have had a sub division of chav , the “Parrites”. also some have a mild degree of literacy in the case of the “fingerpost massif” in that they have been able to oerate a spray can AND spell this on the side of various buildings.