Affectionately known as the “ Arsehole of Derbyshire! Ironville really personifies the chav image. For as long as I remember this tiny village has been as rough as a bag of hammers, with a teenage population that clearly shows that the majority of inhabitants in the mid to late eighties had no TV sets.
As a result of this over breeding, there are now so many youngsters with nothing to do except set each other alight and get out of their tiny minds on Taboo, that a cull is the only reasonable solution I can come to, to save this village from eternal wrongness. I can imagine that the level of incest in this village is much higher than the national average, as nowadays the children play “ I spy with my middle eye” on long journeys, rather than opting for the original version.
Although Derbyshire is famed for it’s dales, the only Dales you will see here are the Rockport sporting kind, with faces full of acne and a gold sovereign adorning every digit. The girls are manlier here than in most areas, which leads me to question the purity of the water, I personally believe that testosterone is a likely addition, possibly to render the moose-pigs infertile…I can only hope.
As per usual, upturned collars are the norm, for the chavs, generally teamed with brand new Reebok classics and Adidas bottoms. As ever, big-brand names adorning every inch of the surface area of their bodies is what they strive for. Comically angled caps, perched atop a spiky fringe complete the look. For the slightly older chav, around the age of 24, the sporting of an electronic tag around an ankle or wrist really gives that “man around town” appeal.
In general, the older members of the community, I’m talking about the 34-year-old grandparents, tend to use the medium of tattoos to express their sentiments. The popular LOVE/HATE combo is all the rage with both men and women, with a swallow on the neck reserved for the chav overlords. Coupled with the self-styled tattoos they acquired whilst detained at Her Majesty’s pleasure, the overall look is something the average chav strives for.
The summer months provide a great reason for Ironville chav and chavettes to peel off the clothing and give other chavs a semi-on at the sight of their bare flesh. When the temperature soars from March onwards, tattooed temptresses with gigantic bosoms and three kids in tow can be seen walking through the village, in bikini tops chuffing on Superkings. Men, aiming for the David Peckham look, with pirate earrings and mobile phones draped around their necks on cords, also like to go for the “less is more” approach, with t-shirts off at the first sign of sun, exposing their ghostly white bodies and raging psoriasis.
As ever, the council houses attract the chavs and chavwagons like moths to a candle. The row of terraced houses, with numerous G reg tarted-up Fiestas, and rows of thongs outside on the washing lines, show what this ex mining village has transformed into. In 1997 there was an outbreak of meningitis in Ironville, because the little chav bastards had been skiving off school to sniff meths and toss bricks at cars on the day of the immunisations at our school. Needless to say, the people who actually caught this disease were the unfortunate normal people who had not yet had chance to be immunised, at their school as the catchment area meant they went to a different school. If only Harold Shipman had been employed to do the meningitis jabs at our school, Ironville might look very different today. I still hold my breath as I travel through Ironville, as I am quite certain that meningitis spores are still airbourne. Then again, the chavs wouldn’t mind if they did contract it, after all it’d be just another way to mimick Vicky Beckham if they did, even though it is a bit extreme!
ironville is one word! so i.v.c should be i.c you thick imbreds xxx
I live in ironville and also own the fast food trailer which is frequently parked up at the resevoir and can confirm that the majority of local people are scum. We generally grid and bear them to keep the customers happy. My Jag is unfortunatly parked on my drive over night and it is a wonder it is still in one piece.
LOL at you sophie ya f**kin pum lol frankie will bang you clean out any`1 got anyfink to say about ironville drive round the ville and stop every chav walking tell em to there faces not over a f**kin website you computer gangstas e,ll have you murked up any time lol we love vandalism and what it,s your house we vandalise not ironville haha so how about suck out ya f**kin mumz your the imbreds were the people who are gettin joke from scum like you chattin s**t somercoates is f**kin scum ripley is f**kin scum riddings is scum you callin ironville you spittin that cus half other villages get f**ked up and really deep inside your just too scared to come through you here you faggits LOL end of ,,,IRONVILLE IS f**kIN MINT and btw im 1 of the lads who got meningitis you got anyfink to say i,ll show you how much stronger uz survivors bcame after that disease so up yours you imbreds and grow the f**k upp…
much peace from jordan pett and dane smurf LOL.
ironville aint a bad place to be yeah sure theres bad bits about it n not most of the people hu ant got a job isn’t thre fault av u eva d of the recession and places like westwood are just the same and condor park is pretty decent so fink what ya wanna fink but then once u live in ironville/codnor park the same time i av then the truth will hit ya smack in the face ya greasy stuck up grebs
Ironville are all scum bags
they all walk roundd iin trampy reebok clothes that were brought from a second hand shop & they dont even f**kin wash anythin.
most of em are dole bangers and if they cant find anythin 2 do why dont they get a f**king job and stop hanging round the streets drinking cider every weekend.
the f**kin 8 year olds think they are f**king big
theyre all snot bags
and that jordan pett is a nob aswell and his sister is a cat
shrek mite one day realise he mite aya face somerwere underneath all the f**kin spots
and his girlfriend Franky thinks she rudeeee nut is she f**k maytteeee
BrINg it On FrAnKy BITCHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!
Lmfao learn how to spell first of all.
I suggest actually attending school.
And half of the stuff this guy is saying is quite harsh I must admit.
But you never actually stop and think. Not everyone who isnt a chav is a greb, to be honest anyone who isnt a chav, dislikes chavs as much as they possibly can.
Oh well I guess thats because of your pathetic behaviour toward people that look different to you, when in actual fact we ALL laugh at you day in day out, at how you dress and act. And how much you chavs resemble the image of what seems to be a caveman.
u dirty fukin scutt bags ya all call i.v but none of ya dare cum fukin dwn so dnt say s**t ova dis fukin website… n as 4 callin menagitas ope ya fukin mum gets it ya fukin priks n if the gyals r more mainly er than tha men dwn ere wat dus tha say bowt u fukin grebby bastards whu were fukin make up n grow ya fukin hair errrr…
I.V.C IS DA PLACE TAH B!!!!!!!!!!!!
ironville aint even bad so why say bad s**t bout it i no i dunna live down iv but its not fukin bad fuk me!!!!!
yeah they have some fights but that duna matta does it !!!
iv (Y.
HA HA f**kIN ROCK CITY YA c**t! WOT SHALL WE BRING AS TOOLS f**kIN LIPSTICK AN HAIR BOBBLES AN SOME EYESHADER 2 TA COVER YA BLACK f**kIN EYES UP AFTER YA BIN SNIFFIN 2 MANY INSENCE STICKS YA PRICK
i live in ironville and im proud so if you want to call us call us to our faces you bunch of pussies.ivc ivc ivc ivc ivc ivc we went for a fight at riddings not long back and they s**t their pants.cum on u twats i bet were you live is not perfect.biach.
YA FUKING GREASY BASTARD GREBS U WHERE YA BLACK MAYCUP U FUKIN IMBREADS U EMOS U SLIT YOUR SELF TA s**t GO AND SLIT YA SELF U TWATS GO AND FAKIN DIE ILL NICK YOUR WATCH INFACT I WONT TOUCH U IM NOT TOUCHIN YOUR GREASY DIRTY BLOOD ALL OVER YOUR CUTS U IS PROBZ FUKIN GAY BUT HEY IF U LUK SWEATY BALLS N SALTY PUBES ITS ALL GD INIT U DIRTY FAKIN c**t
U GIVE GIVE ME JOKE YA PLAYA IF U FINK U FUKIN HARD CUM DWN DIS ENDS WE YA FUKIN SHARPENER BLADE N CUT US UP U FUKIN BELL END BIZZLE*BRAP BRAP*
oi u fukin dirty grebs ironville is fukin mad as toast, ya is so pafetic slayin da best place on earth.. u r fkin gresy grebs we all ya fukin makeup on ya like fukin girls n ya all fukin imbreds n ya ort tah guu n die IVC IVC IVC IVC IVC IVC IVC IVC IVC R DA FUKIN BOLLAX SOO GUU OME
i agree woody
greb scums they ar
U GREB
U FAT c**t HOW CAN U CALL WERE U LIVE U GREB U MINI MOSHER AND UR LIKE A GIRL WEARING BLACK MAKE UP SO f**k OF OUT OF ERE IVC IVC M.A.F
shrek gd on you ivc any1 come down n av a go if you think ur hard enough but dont make us come to you as normal if you think you got what it takes then you now werre ironville is COME ON
i live in ironville u can call me a chav
but f**k it IVC IVC IVC IVC IVC IVC RULES
ive lived in ironville all my life and im no chav.this village is a s**t hole but there is some nice people here to who arnt chavs and some who are . you show me a small village like this one that hasnt got groups of teenagers that hang around the strrets cause they havent got anything better to do then you can call ironville as much as you like .as for the meningist thing it just shows how stupid you really are winding your car windows up get your facts right next time before speaking your mind about something you know nothing about .
Ironville is a respectable town,
Many scholars and intellects have hailed from this industrious, and well rounded community.
People from Ironville are both wise and intelligent and are a credit to the surrounding area, its unfortunate that it is placed next to jacksdale (famed for its population of cat rapists) Riddings (A hick town where bearded ladys rule supreme) and finally codnor park (A legion of toffee nosed scrubbers, most of which i believe were buggerd as babies).
Ironville is a damn fine place , move along.
hahaha. wkd! totally agree! rock on!