The home of the Thorntons chocolate factory is truly the gateway to Derbyshire. This “town” shares it’s borders with the equally difficult areas of Selston and Alfreton, (not to mention Riddings and Ripley.)
For my first three years i was unfortunate enough to live in this shoddy place but the years have taken its toll, with a blossoming chav mecca now standing where the where the foundations of Somercotes once stood.
With easy acces to both Alfreton and Selston, this seems the ideal resting place to set up a chav home. With a bevvy of local eateries and drinking establishments, such as the “Dog and Doublet” there is no reason to want to ever leave.
With a Co-Op on Somercotes Hill, that has recently stepped into the new millenium by installing its own bakery, and a medical centre, there is everything a developing family needs to feel right at home!
This area of town, (with the only remaining bus shelter) and the park provide a natural arena for young chavs and chavettes to gather and put the world to rights. Strewn with special brew and white lightning cans, the chavs have claimed the park as their own, often making use of the street furniture and playground equipment, as impromptu fornication devices. This makes a refreshing “al fresco” change to the carpark behind the co-op or the grave yard.
What town could be complete without the obligatory retail park? Well Somercotes has it all, a huge Aldi, with wall-to-wall teenage Mums and screaming chavlings, a Paaaaaahnd Shop, and a BQ really means you can live the dream!
This carpark is transformed to a circuit by night, where 9 carrat clad chavs and chavettes smoke, drink and thrash their 1l novas. It also handy for bitch-fights, and due to it’s excellent clarity of signal is ideal for a texting frenzy!
For the small number of people who do actually work, there are actually some really good opportunities on the Cotes industrial estate, it’s just a terrible shame that the majority of the teenagers leaving this area are unable to read or write, so the majority of the workers employed there are from other areas. Oh well, why would they want to work anyway, when they can sign on?
wow im starting work in somercotes tomorrow. is that a good idea hahaha i thought it was a lovely place .
Used to go drinking in Alfreton when I worked there! That’s another story – scumbags! Somercotes is scumbag city. Sutton much better. Cotes Park pub is rough as anthing and don’t even get me on The Tiger!! Men are dogs too! In bred city!
I used to live in somercotes with my children and they have grown up fine. I think your looking in the wrong place for chavs and chavettes you should try Ironville, have you seen that place looks like a war zone but thats what i would do with it BLOW IT UP!
i’ve lived in somercotes with my children and they have grown up fine. i think your looking in the wrong place for chavs and chavettes you should be looking in ironville have you seen the state of that place its like a war zone , but then thats what i would do with it BLOW IT UP!
dirty scum bags
somercoats r fukin scum yu pussyoles ivc r cumin 4 ya so wach ya bks ya dirty imbreads
Ironville are the imbreds. And well done on your spelling sir; nearly 9% of the attempted is correct! Moron.
I agree there are some little shits in Somercotes, but it is the minority, I’d like you to name a place where there isn’t! It’s just a shame that the minority is what people see when they pass through our otherwise pleasant and welcoming village. I was born and raised in Somercotes and i turned out just fine, as did all my friends becoming everything from english teachers to civil engineers, not as you label us illiterate dole sitters. I wonder how good your life is that your that bored you write internet posts slagging off villages?
I visited there in Nov. thought everyone was friendly and very helpful..went shopping etc..
had no problems at all and didn’t see much of what is posted on this site..
maybe you had better take another look..and I’m from Canada..
I’ve lived in Somercotes for almost 25 years and yes, we do have our problems but there are certainly worse places. The majority people are very friendly and helpful which is hard ro find these days. I originate from Derby and have no wish to return rhere except for shopping trips and visiting family and friends. My 4 children have grown up in Swanwick and then later in Somercotes. All have very good jobs, pay their own way and are not a burden to anyone. Please don’t ‘paint everyone’ with the same brush. There are more nice people living in Somercotes than the ‘chavettes’ as you put it. So my friend I think you should let people make up their own minds.
what the f**k !!
You cant say that kind of stuff about the kids in somercotes and btw its not cider we drink its vodca and yeah some kids go on the park drinking bottles of cider but thats still wrong ….. and callin us chavs ??? what the f**k who ever u are u should think about what u say…
and thanks alot for dissing the young mums
and also the ones with no jobs
i bet your the perfect one who is earning loads of money
but u still have no right to diss us !!!!
lol, that is so so true! i lived there for 4 years with the ex and moved to Derby then for some unknown reason i moved back 2 years ago. think its coz the house prices were reasonable. but my god the place is full of chavs! single mums and kids with dirty faces and no respect what so ever for anyone else. thanks for the laf