You’ve read the articles on the towns in the Wigan area, Leigh, Lowton, Hindley, etc. Now it’s time to hear about the one, the only… Golborne. And yes, I live there. Where to start? Well, Golborne is a small town on the outskirts of Wigan (though for some f**ked up reason has a Warrington poscode – ew, Warrington). And, you guessed it, Golborne is full of chavs. Now, Golborne isn’t very big, maybe a square mile of so, but from the number of chavs I see hanging around on a Friday night, you’d think there’s enough of them to populate a whole city.
The main chav hangouts of Golborne are ‘the town centre square’ and the local Asda supermarket. Now, these two locations are on opposite sides of the town, so basically you’re likely to run into a ‘crew’ of chavs anywhere in Golborne. Guess what they wear? That’s right – tracksuits. Who in the blue hell told them tracksuits look good? They were lying. And girls, there’s foundation and then there’s looking like you’ve been tango’d. Wash your faces. And if you insist on wearing huge tacky jewellery, at least make it authentic, oui? Ah, and let’s not forget the ever-so-fashionable tucking our ‘trackies’ into socks. Each to their own and all that jazz, but your ‘fashion sense’ hurts my eyes.
The chavs of Golborne are more commonly know as ‘scallies’ – which I believe originated from Liverpool (thus, we can blame scousers for the creation of chavs), but they’re all the same thing. Now, hating chavs because of their dress sense is surely not a good enough reason to do so. In short; if you couldn’t go out of the house without the risk of being victimised and attacked by a group of tracky-wearing youths, you’d hate chavs too. I hate to be stereotypical, but let’s face it, the majority of them are violent, and when not smoking, drinking or doing drugs, are finding people to ‘twat’. ‘Well ‘ard’ – as they say.
Onto the local ‘comp’ – Golborne High School, where most of the chavs of Golborne go (well, when they’re not ‘wagging’ it). What can I say, the exam results prove that chavs aren’t only violent and anti-social, but they’re also retarded. Of course, not every chav of Golborne attends ‘Comp’, several of them go to ‘Lowton High School’ in our neighbouring town, but that’s normally ’cause they’ve gotten expelled from Golborne High.
Oh, and how could I forget ‘the bonk’? I won’t go into an explanation of what it is, but take my advice: don’t go there unless you have a deathwish.
Hmm, all this talk of Golborne is making me feel ill, I think I’ll round it off with this:
Rid the world of filth/STIs/skanks/dirt/[INSERT WORD HERE] : throw bricks at a chav today 
.
One last thing; if for some retarded reason the person reading this is a chav and wishes to comment on my words of wisdom, try it and I’ll rip you like hell. Whatcha gonna do ‘twat’ me? Yeah, k. Go die.
look truth is i live in golborne and it blows , to many chavs and all chavs suck donkey balls
You think you can just sit der and call .. pfff
Come dwn and say it to us !!
You can f**k off you fuckin fanny !
You can f**k off you fuckin fanny !
f**k you !
f**k you !
Listen you lil prick come and say it to us lot you w**ker.
I know you wont because you will get knocked the f**k out !!!!
Listen you lil prick come and say it to us lot you w**ker.
I know you wont because you will get knocked the f**k out !!!!
Listen you lil prick come and say it to us lot you w**ker.
I know you wont because you will get knocked the f**k out !!!!
You well need get a life coz there aint nout rong wiv golborne. your probly a dick hed who only likes them selves and lives on there own n spends all there tym moanin!
w**ker!
if u think u can come on dis site n diss chaveswell u cant so if ya call chaves a gen i will kik 7 shades of shit out of ya kk so f**k off n go suk mi chavv nob.
ar iam goowint be seyin sumert soon! waach this fuckin space!!!!!!
y da f**k ya slagin golborne off der nwt rong wit it fuckin queer goth im a cav i gt m8 dat emo n she is reet as f**k u sound like a propa queer
w**ker !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I BELIVE THAT THE COMMENT ABOVE IS A LOAD OF BULLSHIT EVERY BLOODY TOWN HAS CHAVS EVERY BLOODY TOWN HAS TROUBLE I OFTEN WALK THROUGH GOLBORNE AT NIGHT WITH OUT NO ABUSE BUT YE YA DO GET A FEW NOB EDS WHO THINK THERE GOOD BUT YOU GET THAT EVERY WHERE .
AND JUST BECAUSE THE WEAR f**king TRACKYS AND TRAINERS DOES NOT MEAN THEY SMOKE ,DRUGS OR FINDING PEOPLE TO TWAT WHILE THEY ARE PUMPED UP TO THER HEAD FULL OF ALE DOES IT NOW , ITS THE BLOODY MOCHERS EMO AND WHAT EVEY ELSE SOMEONE DESIDES TO BRING OUT LIKE . WHO SLIT THER WRIST AND ALL THIS SHIT
I THINK THE PERSON WHO WROTE THIS IS OBVIOULY HAS SOME SORT OF THING AGAINEST CHAVS.
MOANING FINISHED
ea ryt , av lived i golborne all ma lyf, n yer a admit it ent tha bst fing on earth bt its not the shitole u mek it out 2 b, n ney not every1 werz trakies , n not every1 is slapped in make up , so dnt go labellin every1 fr golborne fkin chavs coz they ent, ne wayz ow iz it suddenly ad 4 ppl 2 wer traiez!! if they wer soo bad they wudnt b sellin them in tha shops , n no 1 sez " wel ard " round ea so get ya fukin facts str8 , coz ur jst onin shyt n its frigin borin listin 2 ppl goin on bouts sme fings all da tym , u need fynd sumat else 2 do insted ov wastin all ya tym rippin ppl frm golborne !
I work with someone who lives in Golbourne: she fiddles her tax credits and uses her sickness entitlement to go to Cheshire Oakes. Nuff said.
That is so true lol. I hate going anywhere in Golborne after 7pm, for fear of gettin attacked by a bunch of trackie-wearing teenagers, even though im a teenager myself.
iya i used 2 live in golborne n i lived ther got 10 years, i dont think its as bad as u make it our 2 b. im not a chav or anythin but i actually like da place