From birth, the people of Hemel Hempstead are given no chance! Until recently the two local hospitals which supported childbirth where St.albans and Luton, which are hardly chav free zones, you enter any of these hospitals you will find chavs who have been battered and bruised (not always a bad thing) and chavettes who are in labour 9 months after there first period, seriously, the only people with more than 1 braincell in these places are the expectant mothers, and there other braincell is only tempary. But after the ordeal of birth and the newly made mother staring at her bundle of joy/jail bait and then flicking on hollyoaks you have the children starting primary school.
Oh woaw what a choice. Woodhall farm (the area i was raised) homes two primary schools. The largest one being holtsmere end. This place has more pikeys than a car boot sale and more lice than peter andre’s nutsack. But if that doesn’t quite sound to the standard of your sprog there is an alternative. Brockswood. My old school, where the residents of local caravan site attend, where they do not bother with teaching but just fiddle your sats results later. And after school you have the parents swarming outside all with there cigarettes and new borns, but you will only see these parents picking there little darlings up if the parents have actually finished school themselfs.
Then we move to the senior schools. again. what a choice, a choice of 6 schools all with very different qualitys. 3 of these schools are not that bad.
JFK- catholic school
Hemel Hempstead – All rounder, very adverage
Cavendish – Sports college
then we get onto the other 3
longdene – where the students are really as thick as Susan XXXXX’s pubic hair, they are however quite harmless, half of them dont speak much english and the other are still slower than a row boat team with no arms
Adeyfield – the boys of adeyfield are fine. there normal. the girls however…most of them have hopes that maybe 1 of these 40 yearold men they have been meeting up with online will want to keep them, and not just fuck them and then be thankful they never asked there name, these girls are highly trained slappers, most of them losing there virginity before there 13th birthday to a lad old enough to be there father. This trend carrys with them for life. This school recently offered all of its students a free chlamidyia test and the ammount of possitive results was staggering. This is also the closest school to leisure world, which i will expand on later
Astley Cooper – The arsehole of the education system. Try and drive past this school in the winter without being pelted with rocks coverered in snow, or even try and walk past without getting high on the fumes of the joint the 6 students are all sharing. this school is the training ground of drug dealers and battered girlfriends. They may not leave school with GCSE’s, but the boys will leave with an ASBO and a CSA bill and the girls will leave with a baby in there womb and there friends left in suspence of what colour it will come out. its not all bad though, living in grovehill is a free ticket to never do a days work and get a free council house, and if you cant figure out what to spend you DLA on then the henry wells square is inspirational
Henry wells square – wow… what mother fucker thought this up, you have a very high ratio of unemployment, alcohol and drug use, benefit thieves and incredably young parents. How do you fix this problem? By putting a shopping centre in the middle of it! And what a centre! You have 2 pubs? A florest selling equipment to grow your own plants?? A liquer store??? And a car parts store so you can sup up your nova the way you have always wanted!!! WHAT THE FUCK HEMEL??? THIS IS LIKE PUTTING A MCDONALDS IN A FAT CAMP!!! THESE PEOPLE DO NOT NEED MORE WAYS TO GET TANKED!!! THEY NEED A BASIC FOOD SHOP, A CHARITY SHOP AND POSSIBLY A NEWS AGENTS SO AS THEY CAN SEE IF THERE GRAFITTI ON A LOCAL SHOP MADE IT IN TO THE HEROLD EXPRESS!!! Grovehill is truly the worst design since neon strips you can stick under your car. Nuke it.
The town centre is a fantastic place! You name any cheap takaway we got it! Pizza hut, Dominos, Mcdonalds, KFC, Burger King, Subway, Greggs, its all there! We got the civic centre so you can claim all your benefits such as your DLA for your bad back, only 4 more payments till you can get that moped. The college, for those who fail school, the health centre with a great poster saying come here for free condoms and the morning after pill, you will be supplied with either even if you are under 16. You of course have all your sports shops, 3 pound shops and a ton of cheap clothes shops, including “2good2be true” with the famous shirts costing at only 50p and sandersons, a shop selling bongs, crack pipes, cheap munchfood, energy drinks, and anything a drug user could ever need, yet, police completly ignore this shop and the obvious intentions of the clientel.
Then we move onto leisure world, which i have never read a review on here which hasn’t mentioned. This place is the chav breeding ground, it has probley had more children concieved behind it than johnny vagas has had hot dinners. This place really is a shithole, it is in jarmans park which has 3 main buildings. Leisure world, Mcdonalds, Tescos. So poured into the mixture you have Tescos supplying cheap drink, Mcdonalds catering, and Leisure world giving the shit music, shelter and condom machines. So you can imagine what it is like in there. I have been there many times due to the cinema, and on waiting to be picked up it is not uncomman 2 see girls who look pre-pubesent dressed as what can only be described as 4 foot tall prostitutes getting into cars with much older men who drive behind the building for 10 minutes or so before dropping them back infront of the neon sign. If you go there and listen, see if you can go 30 seconds without hearing fuck, cunt and shit, spend a night there and watch how many fights break out, the bouncers are more useless than a condom machine in the vatican and are more interested hitting on the younger girls. This place is where all the slappers from adeyfield come 2 meet there dream man, sad thing is, none of them have noticed that not a single guy in a nova and a track suite who fucks them before learning there name ever calls back. Unfortunatly, live in hemel this is your life, the council are doing something about this though. They have just opened a new club called the function rooms and are closing the hospital. I guess there leaving natural selection 2 wipe of this plague we call the chav.
Never read so much crap in my life. It’s a good town.
The author of this article has further demeened Hemel Hempstead by the foul language of choice. What a pity they could not articulate their views in a manner that would suggest distance from the very type of people they are criticisiing. Their views though hilarious at times are reminiscent of many towns and cities around the country where social and economical deprivation exist and, as has been said before, certain areas of London are far worse. In fact, during the 20+ years that I have lived here, I have met many people who have moved here from London to escape the crime and violence. They actually praise the town and it’s schools (most of the schools anyway). As for the council, I have worked in partnership with them and though their council housing stock is virtually non existant the area of Dacorum Borough is the largets in Hertfordshire streaching as far as Tring. The people are generally friendly and accommodating and will not judge you by the car that you drive nor the style of your Nike trainers. Not snobbish, just genuinely friendly. Of course there is good and bad everywhere. I lived in St Albans from a young child and the drug dealing, prostitution and social deprivation is there too, however, I do admit that visually it is clearer to see in Hemel.
Hemel used to be nice. Now every time I go back it’s just horrible. Look in the town centre, the lack of places to eat is obvious.
Where are the hot women of Hemel??
Fat single mothers who waddle to KFC in their cheap tacky clothes. Chavs………….
I totally agree with what Hannah said about the description of Astley will be better fitted to Cavendish. Astley Cooper isnt as bad as what people make out, ive just done my A Levels there and have had no problems what so ever. Yes it may not be the best school in Hemel but I wouldn’t say it was no where near as bad as what this person made out to be. The teachers are all good there and will sort out any problems necessary.
And as for Grovehill. Well I just happen to live in this area and id just like to say I do NOT live in a ‘free council house’. My parents work hard to pay the mortage for where I live and I happen to live in a very nice friendly environment. Its also not a free ticket to never do a days work because both my parents are at work all day as well as my brother, we do not sponge of the council like several people and we do not live in a ‘bad/dodgy’ area. Ive lived in Grovehill for 16 years and have always found it a safe area to live in. If anything Highfield is mush worse compared to Grovehill!
That was a great description and I agree that you’re not trying to slate the town but people have to realise that Hemel Hempstead isn’t near perfect. If you want to see near perfect go to Switzerland for a holiday. What people also have to realise is that Hemel Hempstead isn’t the only place that has problems for example, London. The capital of the country with some of the richest people in the world living there in areas such as Chelsea, but then you get bad areas aswell like Brixton, Hackney and so on that are much worse than Hemel Hempstead, people dying from being shot or stabbed, drug dealing on a huge scale, housing projects literally filled with drugs dealers and abusers.
It comes down to up bringing, decissions in life that your parents made to move to Hemel Hempstead, social class etc.
Hemel has an equal ratio of council areas as you mensioned in the artical and also moderate to rich areas such as Leverstock green and boxmoor. I mean Roger Moore (James Bond actor) lived in Leverstock Green at one point and Theo Walcot (Arsenal football player) lives in Felden.
Anyway to conclude
I’m sitting here in my room looking out at the trees behind Astley Cooper school, and if you lived in Woodhall farm and went to Astley Cooper school you would have walked past my house everyday through the little play area next to the road before the rear entrance to the school. The used to be a lot of trouble before but in recent year Woodhall farm has improved a lot, I haven’t seen any trouble now for quite some time. I can freely walk to Sainsbury’s and back without encountering a chav…and why? Because they’re most likely in jail, have a child or two to look after and have no time to hang about the streets or are indoors getting high all day long and you know what, I really don’t mind them doing that because I don’t have to see them.
As for other areas I wouldn’t know but the only times you will see these people about in town or out and about is during normal 9-5 working hours because they live on benifits or can’t find a job (because there is a resession at the moment) and have nothing better to do.
My advise is,
If you’re not a chav. Then I’d suggest going shopping either in London or Brent Cross or even online for things it’s so much better and you have a lot more choice, you probably have a car or motorbike as transport to get about so you don’t need to try and find somewhere to stand on a bus with all the rest of the single mums and their prams, for night life watford seems to offer a chaveless, well not completely free but you’ll maybe see one in 500 people. St Albans also isn’t too bad especially Lloyds no.1 bar, and sometimes Batchwood…it depends really Friday seems to be chav freeish. If you’re going to go out in Hemel however then the Function Rooms seems to be the only music venue where you would expect people like me and you to go but only on Saturdays. Other wise in terms of pubs…The Green Man (used to be the Litten Tree) in Leverstock Green, The Crabtree in Adeyfield and The Full House down town seem to be the only chav free pubs to go to…well I can’t say no chavs go there because I know I sometimes see one or two in the Full house but I’m pretty sure the Green Man is a safe bet. This has only been recently from what I’ve seen going out.
Anyway I think my essay is complete.
Regards
Andy