United Kingdom | Chavtowns - Britain's worst places to live!

Archive for the ‘United Kingdom’ Category

Torbay

Posted on: February 12th, 2012 by admin 3 Comments

How Torbay isn’t on here I don’t know, okay so Torbay isn’t technicly a town or a city but a collection of towns and villages that are kind of glued together. Torbay is made up of five or more towns the best known being (size order):

Torquay- The largest town, with all the shops, Torquay is the place the chavs and everybody else goes when they want an okayish shoppping trip but can’t be f**ked to go somewhere decent. Torquay is where the slutty female chavs gather to buy clothes and hang out, it is also the place with all the nightclubs and alcohol are and, during the night drunk and passed out chavs.

Paignton- Next largest, Paignton is where the skatepark filled with skateboarder chavs and little chav wannabes hang out. Less critical situataion than Torquay but it has paignton community college which is home to the majority of the bay’s teen pregnancies. In the various sections of paighnton there is a flux in the number of chavs depending which housing estate your in.

Brixham- fewer chavs here but still quite a few. Sometime if you wonder past the swimming pool just after school you can see 12-16 year old chavs smoking in their uniformand stuff along those lines. Thepopulation in brixham is slightly more normal but there is a clear emo/goth culture as well but in the last few years they have become less noticeable.

Churston: Small have pub and posh grammer school and yeah don’t know much bout’ Churston

Galmpton: t’s next to Churston

comment if you have anything to add

Rating: 7.7/10 (13 votes cast)

Rating: +1 (from 9 votes)

Gosport, Hampshire

Posted on: February 3rd, 2012 by admin 3 Comments

Gosport is a town desolate of tourists. Many residents blame a group of Tories who sit in an office and wear blue cable knit jumpers and sometimes close down museums, or as they prefer to be known – the local council. The council have argued that they have done all that they can to improve Gosport as a town, so I have gone to the liberty of outlining some of it’s better features that may appeal to day trippers.

Gosport is a seaside shithole with a pebble beach and a concrete eyesore that is often also referred to as ‘the promenade’. ‘The promenade’ is lined with old glorified cupboards that fat people sit in during the summer, you may be thinking by cupboards I mean beach huts. I do not mean beach huts. Behind the cupboards and sheltered benches – or public urinals- is an unkempt field covered in dog shit left by the early morning dog walkers who feel that by getting up before everyone else gives them the divine right to leave their dog’s excrement strewn across the beach

The beach has a wide choice of two cafes, the most central Pebbles cafe will serve anything from processed chips to processed sausage with a side order of the daily mail. See adults and kids alike flock to the ice cream window to have frozen milk poured into stale cones by an acne ridden school kid trying to earn money to fund his cigarette habit.

If the beach is not you’re thing then why not head into Gosport town center and experience the lunchtime delights that are Greggs and Mcdonalds. Popular amongst the elderly Greggs offers a wide range of freshly baked saturated fat perfect to be enjoyed with a flat soda avaliable from many of the high street’s pound shops. However, if baked goods aren’t your thing you’re in luck because the high street has not one, not two but three fast food outlets including the famed KFC, once said to be “the tourist highlight of the town” by a woman on the bus.

If you’ve managed to keep your lunch down you may want to enjoy some of the Gosport nightlife. Diverse and contemporary, Emma’s offers a chance to listen to some of the latest music, providing you go in the 1990s. Emma’s has become famed in Gosport for it’s unusually sticky floor which may sound bad but not it comparison to Gosport’s late nightclub Moodeaze which was closed down for health and saftey reasons due to it’s unusually sticky floor, some have speculated that this may be a culmination of urine and semen but were unable to say for sure because the scent was masked by the ever gorgeous smell of nicotine, body odour and cheap perfume.

For those unwilling to mingle with Gosport’s clubbers, Wetherspoons offers and cheap alternative, so cheap in fact that it is quite possible to become paralytic for under £15; whilst this may sound concerning at first you’d really have to experience the wonders of such a town to understand why a night out is better spent completely unconscious.

By: Rachael

Rating: 7.8/10 (43 votes cast)

Rating: +18 (from 22 votes)

Bangor City

Posted on: February 1st, 2012 by admin 2 Comments

There’s a good reason Bangor isn’t already on here; no-one knows about it enough to give a f**k. And to be honest, that’s the best thing you can do for a place like this.

The nearby estate of Maesgeirchen breeds chavs like a roadkill badger breeds maggots, and they completely swarm the city. But it’s not just the ratio of chav:normal person that makes it so bad. These chavs can’t even be angry or violent properly like most city chavs. Remember those kids i school who’d hang around with the bigger bullies and peer around from behind them shouting abuse instead of actually being tough? That’s every single one of the chavs in Bangor. Every one of them has an uncle/cousin/mate/boyfriend/dad/brother/all-of-the-above who’s a local fighting legend and will kick the shit out of you for looking at them funny, yet said legend never actually appears. These fuckwits can’t even muster the attitude to finish a fight they start even as a group, unless it’s against an OAP or a phone booth!

Not only that, but the rest of locals seem to support these walking-abortions too. The only thing that brings any sort of money into Bangor is the students (themselves not the brightest of sparks to have chosen to study in f**king Bangor…), so the for 1/4 year that they’re not around the place almost literally grinds to a halt. To that end the univrsity and students are hated because they don’t bring enough money to the area to support the dole-monkeys for the whole year and consequently are given a hard time just for being there. So what did the council do to fix this in recent years? Builds a f**king shopping centre in the city centre… When every other unit on the high street is shut already… There are units in this centre that have NEVER been occupied. You’d think they might have learnt their lesson, but they’ve recently allowed the build of a f**king huge new student union complex…

Perhaps this will help one or two of the chavs muster the courage to actually be the hard bastard they all purport to be… Folks, please, don’t EVER go to Bangor1 Just let.it.die…

By: Gee Allen

Rating: 5.9/10 (27 votes cast)

Rating: -8 (from 18 votes)

Wishaw (pishy Wishy)

Posted on: February 1st, 2012 by admin No Comments

What an absolute shit hole this place is!! I had the upmost misfortune to grow up in this Ned/drug dealing/inbreed/benefit seeking little shithole.. Apart from its hospital Wishaw has not seen much new development in the last few years although thank f**k there is a hospital so close to the nebouring sess pits of craigneuk, wishaw hill,pather and netherton /muirhouse.. As the amount of stabbings, drug overdoses , teenage pregnancies keeps the hospital very busy.. The high street is a f**king dump.. there are junkies on every alley throughout the pish stinking place and the uneasy feeling of walking through the place when the sun goes down is very well known as the amount of absolute tits come out to play after probably waking up from there drug induced comas. If you cannot adequately defend yourself do not think of going on a night out here it is full of little f**king vermin or some tanned steroid pumped reprobate who’s idea of being a hard man is to drink the little insecure homo boy inside his head quiet and the viciously attack the most respectable looking person there. All in all whoever reads this if you live here and feel the grass is greener somewhere else’s your spot f**king on, if I could I would build a wall round it to stop the plague that is these people, spreading there infection!! And there are nice people here just not many !!

By: Pishy wishy

Rating: 7.4/10 (18 votes cast)

Rating: -1 (from 11 votes)

scummy seaside (Blackpool)

Posted on: January 28th, 2012 by admin 1 Comment

Blackpool, although you may think it’s a jolly seaside resort with candy floss and donkeys, is a scumbucket for the transients who come here to draw benefits in a holiday resort instead of an inner city. go back a few streets from the prom, and you will see the deprivation, the ghettos and the scummy pubs that make up the REAL Blackpool. It’s a town full of chavs, career benefit scroungers and don’t get me started on the drugs and crime. It’s full every weekend of idiots that get so drunk they cant control their bladders – yes, women too, and middle aged women with messages such as ‘I’m up for it’ (Yuk) emblazoned on T shirts across their flabby boobs – which, incidentally flap up and down on their beer bellies when they jump up and down to the music in any one of the dive bars along Bank Hey Street. It’s full of single mothers with doorkey babies (conceived to get a council house) all with the Fkeetwood Facelift hairstyle (vigorously scraped up ponytail) all covered in gold that they either have had nicked for them, or have not paid a bill in order to buy. Yes there are decent hardworking people in Blackpool, but it’s an increasingluy dangerous unpleasant place to live, and nothing ever gets done about it. For the record, I work with social services – so I do actually know what I’m talking about. I live here only until I’ve saved enough to get out of this hellhole of a country!

By: alison c

Rating: 8.6/10 (39 votes cast)

Rating: +13 (from 21 votes)

Username		Remember Me?
Password
		Register