Where do you start? unfortunately i live on a chavs estate (hopefully not for much longer) and my neighbours are as follows
1) a noisy couple who argue violently with each other and air their dirty laundry in public.
2) a chav who loves that shite heavy bass (music?) and thinks everyone else loves it even at all hours.
3) a halfwit couple who dont mind their dog barking at all hours -”coz its a guard dog”
4) another half wit who owns a little yappy dog which is left out 24/7 to make a noise all night.
5) a block of flats full of chavs near my house that think shouting is a standard way of communicating and seem to have a can of strong lager constantly welded to their hand.
6) nearby chavs who like the sound of crashing a football against a garage door (which is probably not theirs)
and the list goes on……
the funniest thing happenned to me the other day, i decided to go into town on a bus and while waiting at the bus stop heard a young chav in a heap of crap cavalier shout out get a car you bussers!  that amused me cos my car was 8 years younger than his and probably worth 20 times as much !! lord i hate this wave of low life chav scum.

now i happen to like the city very much that im about to talk about but it,like many other places has a bunch of tosspots that will have  apop for no reason,the city in question is Norwich but i do have to say again that i like the place loads…….

it was a Saturday night in norwich,my friends band were playing a gig so me and a mate went along,the band are lovely and i love there sound so me and my mate really enjoyed there set,the place in question was an ok establishment,you know nothing to great but not that many chavs and more of an alternative kinda crowd,but there are exceptions to the rule,there always is.
now i saw the twat in question as soon as i got in there,his girlfriend was a whore that had hardly any clothes on and at every opportunity would shake her tits like she was an angelic princess when everyone in that room knew she was a dirty slut(even her man i hasten to say,cunts like him dont have brains,they want sewer rat whores that suck for breakfast,lunch,and tea)either way there he was,the dick that he was in all its glory,typical chav,skin tight muscle top,some kind of tracksuit bottom and an attitude to boot,im bet if you lifted his shirt up he would of had a cross tattooed on his arm or even better,some barbed wire tattooed around his arm,oh pammy,see what you have done!anyhow,he was the type of bloke that you didnt feel comfy around,like if you look at him he will come stove your face in…a nice looking chap all round would you say?

the band played there set,they were good as they always are and after there set we all kinda got together and had a drink before packing up and going back home,during this time i went to the toilet….guess who walks in bout 30secs after Ive gone,our friendly neighbourhood chav c**t that wants trouble in all its form…the conversation went like this

chav c**t-”what did you think of that band?”

me-”oh i really like the brownies there a great band”

c.c-”well i thought they were f**king shit”

me-(and there was no attitude what so ever in me saying this,i was out with my friends for a laugh not a fight and this bloke was really quite big,i didnt want any trouble)…..”well opinions vary”

at this comment he pushed me up against the wall,pulled back his big meaty clump of bones we call a hand and would of twatted me if his mate had pulled him off saying “woo hoo”…what a f**king tosspot,i mean in a day and age where free speech is sort of ok, for me to say i liked the band when he didnt and then almost get a smashing for it kinda makes you think even less of these low life fucks even more

i know 2 things….

1…that some poor sod probably got a slap of that meathead on Saturday night because he was clearly in the mood for hitting someone,would of probably been someone who said he prefers Ben Sherman to burberry and who would of probably been smaller than him or just clearly not going to fight back…poor sod whoever you were!

2.that c**t will get his comeuppance one day….

A old town. Its victorian lamp posts still hang in the park, Pictures
are displayed of its past with victorian people having fun, walking
along the town center with its hanging flowers you’ll be hard pressed
to find a building under 100 years old. A 800 year old church tops the
town center street off with its eligent presence and clock tower. What
could be wrong with this scenic pictureqsue town?

As you enter the town you will be greated with rural fields filled with
gyspy Caravans burning things, fighting each other in there own inbred
hell. As you continue your driving dodging the sciving 15 year olds
running across the main road (sometimes charging around the pavement on
bikes trying to knock people off) you’ll come across the park, next to
the large deep mere and with a pavaillain. Of course the park is
vandlised and full of Chavs, though the Pavaillain is the most populat
hang out, its been vandlised so many times you cant see the base paint,
and of course drugs and sex with there 15 year old school drop outs,
most with at least 1 baby are the order of the day as they hurl
pleasent abuse in groups of 8 as you walk past trying to live your
life. The sewers reak as you enter the town as more groups of sciving
kids in trackies hang around the toilets with fags they get people to
buy from Martins newsagents. Nearby is the USA Chicken where the
romantoc fools take there well fit 14 year old smoking pregnant birds
for a date, playing the machine.
This area on a saturday or Friday night, or any night becomes a pissed
hotspot of ASBO’s, as the fights start, windows often get smashed with
knife actions sometimes ending in a stabbing or pregnancy. The
Grayhound is often the church of Chav, at the ringing of the 5 aclock
church bell (seeing the the clock on the church is now usless as its
been vandelised and the hands nicked) is there signal to go to the
grayhound and drink themselves into a stuper where there behavior
changes from hurling abuse at everyone not inside a tracksuit and
theving as much as possible from Woolworths who made the mistake of not
having security cameras to fighting, stabbing, arson.
As pleseant as these folk are, There merely the average resident, the
real pain is the chav king and queen. The Pondscum known as the local
gypos. Never on the law obiding, they mug, steal, squat, nick, burn,
injure and vandlising the terrified elderly residents and everyone else
between. All this is occasionally interupted with the sounding of
police sirens. So for those travelling threw Diss, Don’t stop. keep
going! You wont find Salvation here.

probably the only place in norfolk other than kings lynn, norwich and yarmouth where chavs were born

well where do i start, i’ve lived here all my life and i’ve gotta honestly say……thetford isn’t too bad as long as you know your roots and you know where 2 go at what time. if you would like to be randomly assulted by teenage chavs in the middle of the night then go to the abbey farm area, the pine close district or the St johns massive. or even if you wanna get given an eye full when just going to town in the late morn/afternoon, you can see many chavs drinking wife-beater and sitting outside woolies or even the 12 year olds who love to play the slot machines in USA chicken and Mr chips.

but if you would like a different scenery, take a jmp on the T1 bus to lincoln way in abbey farm, where you can really see many different fighting activities between portugasse, lithuanas (sp?) and the thetford possey. if you are lucky you would more than likely see blue sirens blaring out at 1 in the morning because someone has got stabbed over ”looking” at the other agender. so check point areas : stay away from chaville ; abbey farm, St johns, pine close and even ladies estate can become a world war 2 ground even though i have a few friends living there.

the recommended areas of thetford are the willows, cloverfields and nunnery drive, virtually everywhere else is roaming with capper slapper 17 year olds looking for fights down castle park every friday or saturday night. one time i could remember some chavs started on me and my friends about 2002, i looked at hime and he goes ”yeh u wanna stop looking at me?”……..and i was just like *sigh* chav!! anyway if you would like to be avoided by being blatently murdered by the McChav’s of thetford, then i would suggest to hire a few bodyguards even though it would stop them and there 300 cousins and brothers.

if you would like to purchase food and drink without the harm of seeing chavs, go to the big tescos as chavs fear to go over onto the cloverfields estate for the reason that people over there are to friendly and afraid that they will give them a big hug so they will run with there 4 year old in the pram. but otherwise if you looking for a good friday night brawl, go to the rose and crown, the greene dragon, the red lion (owned by portugasse now) or USA chicken where the chavs often like to live up to there expectations and buy the chicken fillet burger to satisify there needs after downing 4 cans of stella, i mean wife beater.

but if many of you followers who are reading this, the industrial estate is idea place to go if you are looking to purchase many hard substance drugs such as speed, ketamine, coke and even if you score lucky you can get abit of skag for the likes of the bald headed, non-straight line walkers.

so in conclusion if you would like a quiet drink, go to the albion, the ark, or the dolphin, if otherwise then you know where to go, all of the above lol. best place for non-chav commercialised food would be the taste of china on white heart street, but avoid going a few 100 metres up the road on weekend, as you will see many chavettes having slapping fights and calling each other ”schalgs” outside Star o.k kebab, warning, they must refuel on the way home so they normally go to the kings head or the chase pub(even though they do a good steak and chips)

so dont say i didnt warn you, thetford is very very scary. thank you.