ChavTowns
Username Remember Me?
Password
Register

Archive for the ‘Suffolk’ Category

Brandon

This article has: 2 Comments
Share on Tumblr

Brandon – A small town a few miles from an even dirtier scumhole (Thetford). Nasty anti social cretins roam the streets by day smoking their drugs and holing up in dissused childrens homes jacking up and fulfilling their life long dreams of being nothing more than filthy addicts. The town itself is extremely run down and covered in a vast amount of litter and always has a distinct smell of animal feaces throughout due to the farms that surround the town, although this obviously cannot be helped it doesnt make the place any more enjoyable to be in. Walking along the streets of Brandon is quite unpleasent due to the constant backlogged conjestion the roads have throughout the town, it is used as a rat run for drivers thus making the air in brandon considerabley dirty and virtually unbreathable most of the time. All in all if your thinking of taking a trip through the area  you  might want to rethink your route, Brandon is a disgusting little pit with nothing more than a desolate marketplace covered in broken bottles  and carrier bags, many bordered up shops, a Tesco with unfreindly and downright rude staff and the hooligans that gather there at night trying to look intimidating to the rest of the locals who have to put up with this poor little S**thole we call a town. 

By: MrNobody

Rendlesham

This article has: No Comments
Share on Tumblr

rendlesham is a random estate near woodbridge which used to be for US air force people to live. but now they have left it is just a s**tey housing estate. it used to have a mall, burger king, swimming pool, bowling alley, theatre, gym, cinema. now all its got is a costcutter and a primary skool. it is a pretty g place to live there is blood on the old angel theatre building where someone tried to punch thru the glass and there is also a wierd cult who have the specially made houses for them and these are the nicest houses in the estate. it is run by some wierd scouse kid called thomas XXXXX who lures innocent young girls off the street and mates with them. so people hav no choice but to become skanky chavs so he is not attracted to them. they normally spend their days riding bmxs thru costcutter whilst filming on phones and then a relaxing evening drinking fosters in the park or having bonfires in the whole. nearest police station is in woodbridge which is being closed down soon anyway so u can basically do wat u want in rendlesham i murdered 12 people this morning and no one minds infact i got a medal at the blue lagoon lounge bar which is the heart of rendlesham community
By: lloyd banks

Lowestoft

This article has: 25 Comments
Share on Tumblr

So, unbeknownst to me, the UK has a group of possible contenders for the scenario witnessed in Battle Royale. This group of people are known as Lowestoftians. I’m pretty sure if we stuck them all on the Isle of White and told them to off each other, they would walk straight into the sea and drown. If they should manage to even start killing each other we should probably just off the last one standing anyway, as I don’t see any good coming from mixing Lowestoftian back into the human genepool.

During my short stay in the cesspool of gormless men and severely pale and overweight single mothers called Lowestoft I witnessed several things that seemed like they were taken straight out of the horror movie Eden Lake. One of them being a fat acne-covered excuse for a human female with half her zitty ass hanging out of her cheap s**tty ASDA jeans walking down the high street while scratching her exposed buttock. It all reminded me all too well of my visit to Whipsnade Zoo.

I also had the distinct pleasure of witnessing the exotic bodyart on display throughout this s**thole of epic proportions. One of them being a f**king tool bragging about how drunk he was the night before whilst sporting a very well done “Sober” tattoo on his neck. I don’t understand why anything with functioning eyes would ever procreate with such a monstrosity.Then again, I feel that way about most people in Lowestoft until I see their partners. If you are into viewing what a typical Lowestoftian family looks like you can sit at McDonalds and drink a coffee whilst viewing the typical family dinner.

I couldn’t even believe they had a coffee shop seeing as no one in Lowestoft knows how to pronounce Caffe Latte without it sounding like some awful venerial disease. I’m pretty sure that by the time I have the misfortune of going back to that godforsaken sewer that coffee shop will be replaced by some kind of pound-store ( that’s quid-store for you Lowestoftians).

It seems a Lowestoftians idea of entertainment is to watch The only way is Essex or mindlessly spending all their government issued money at the arcade. Also, the pubs are a f**king disgrace, I’ve been to Turkey which pretty much a 3rd world country and seen better pubs than in this excuse for a garbage tip. I want to have my drink without having to listen to teenages rambling on in their native language whilst abusing a pool table.

I can’t imagine a better place to start a medical research facility seeing as no one has jobs and everyone is about as f**king intelligent as a chimp.

The best thing about Lowestoft is the road to London.

Bury St Edmunds

This article has: 12 Comments
Share on Tumblr

Bury St Edmunds; in many ways is a very unique town. There are many good things to this town from the historic past and the low crime rate. However in Bury i feel there is a very high amount of “chavs”. Im a 15 year old male who lives in Bury and i do not want to be labelled as a chav. The main sign of chavness is the shockingly high amount of anti-social behavior, for example when i leave school i observe the high amount of smokers as young as Year nine smoking cigarettes and the elders even potentially smoking drugs. The older chavs tend to drive around Bury aggresively on mopeds being idiots, the place i often see them is on the Moreton Hall estate around a vandalised shelter. Moreton Hall is supposed to be a affluent nice estate which it is, However it is spoilt by idiotic chavs. Moreton Hall is completely opposite to the other side of town (Howard Estate) where there are disgusting houses and a reputation for drugs and anti social behavior. A true example of class differences. The conclusion, Bury is a wonderful town but like many other towns and cities there are chavs but Bury’s unique features like the Abbey Gardens and the historic streets this town is a relatively low chavtown. Just a word of advice; stay out of the Howard Estate!

Bury ST edmunds

This article has: 5 Comments
Share on Tumblr
A historic market town situated in suffolk and surrounded by rolling fields and picturesque villages,Bury does have the potential to be, or at least sound like a nice place. And as you enter the inbred suffolk metropolis for the first time you are none the wiser of the hidden crapfest that is this town. Firstly if you walk down the street your hat could be taken of and throw on the floor by the little buggers. They always go around fighting and getting scank whore teenagers pregnant. As well as cheekily saying to busdrivers “yeah yeah yeah mate can i go to lane mate” It sick and disruptive and out of order. I have seen people stick up to them like the great jack taylor who was in the news for saving a womens life from the crazy chavs. However people in bury all know of Merradize the big. He is one of the biggest chavs ever and goes around on friday hurting people it’s sick. If your going to bury just forget it. I advise you to rip it out of your maps and delete it from your gps.

Continue reading “Bury ST edmunds” »