Ahhhhh chorley….im not saying its scummy but our town motto is be aware!!!! Honest it actually is! ha ha!

well, what can i say about this…place? Its chavtastic!

For your chavy clothing needs we have temptation (rather upset that its not still called chorley girl ha ha that was ace) This shop stores a lovely array of clothes to aid you in your slagging up for drinkin cider on the park. And its opposite claires accessories, which is always handy for earring so big they should have a budgie sat on em!
For the male chavs we of course have TWO crappy sports stores, opposite each other too, ooooooh gang warfare! Theres also the wonderous chorley market, its decreased in size quite lot from when i was little, but you can still find some bargain shite on there, theres even a make up stall for you buy your knock off umpa lumpa orange foundation!

There is a bus station!!! Its amazing it has buses (if your lucky), its a great sight for tourists =D

Basically chorley is forking cwap!!!!

Old Malden and Worcester Park are both perfectly pleasant places to live, yet nearby Malden Manor is a cold sore on the genitals of civilisation.

Despite providing a useful railway staion, “the Manor” is best known for the hideous flats and equally hideous inmates (sorry, residents) of the housing project on Sheephouse Way.

Surly and monosyllabic, the chav youths selfishly pick the Co-op at Old Malden (nearer to my house than their barracks-like shitholes, the little wankers!) to hang out on a Friday. It’s all there: hoodies, shell-pants, ten gallons of cheap aftershave (boys), piercing voices and more effort spent on picking g-strings than denims (girls).

The bastard Tory newsletter that comes through my door even has sympathy for the scum! That’s when you know that old principles have gone down the pan: I have no time for the Tories but at least when they stuck to their guns they wouldn’t have even pretended to like these scummy wastes of air and water that surely must be the first batch in an experiment for human culling. But no – the local Toryboys actually have sympathy and want to help, so they say. I can only hope that it’s just empty vote-winning promises.

As a former resident of Wimbledon, I never thought I’d look fondly at Phipps Bridge (the nearby equivalent). But at least that had a bit of history…..

I live in Caterham. I ahve my whole life.
The Chavs are EVERYWHERE. Down my road, next door, sitting in the car park of Tesco, infesting the Skate Park no less. At 2 in the morning, the high-pitched squeal of a moped can be heard screeching it’s way through the town at 20mph. They walk around in hordes of horribly unflatteringly ugly clothes that gives you a good impression of their attitudes to life – “don’t care, as long as I look my ‘mates’ and spent £300 on a fake gold chain”.
Chav culture – one example, a chav on his pedal bike riding on the pavement. My friends were standing on the pavement, waiting for another to come out the newsagent. This chav had the nerve to screech to a halt next to one of my friends and demands that he moves out the way. Firstly, he’s on a bike that should be on the ROAD, secondly he didn’t even ask nicely. He thinks it’s funny to start on my friend. Wisely, we start to leave, but this chav isn’t having any of it. We go past a pub as this chav is effing and blinding at the top of his voice. To make things worse, about 40 odd chavs make their way out the pub and start to follow him. Some older people try and calm this guy down,a nd tell him to abck off, but this chav wants a fight. We go a couple of roads, and he’s still going. Just as we near our friend’s house, the chav starts coming in for a proper fight. Typical chav culture, the odd 40 following get out their camera phones. My friend runs like the wind, the chavs eventually leave bored.
Caterham – the shithole. Come at your own risk!

If you can think of nothing better to do than rub shoulders with pregnant teens, and work shy,dole scum,benefit seeking council housers,then Redhill is the place for you!
If you’ve ever had the misfortune to be in Redhill on, say, a Friday night, you too must have suffered the fighting,vomiting, and general nastiness of this town that manners forgot. It gets better too…..now that the old embassy nightclub has been ‘blinged’ up to the ‘glitzy’ Liquid/Envy shiteclub, you can bring upon yourself a whole night of violence, whether you want to be involved or not. It doesn’t take much to get in there either, as long as your drunk,have breasts,or know the bouncers best mates sister, your in! And if you think it can’t get any better than that, head on down to Favourite Chicken for your very own helping of vomit burger, and if your really lucky, a good old fashioned stabbing. Seriously, this has actually happened outside here. When you’ve recovered from your night of hell, why not pop into Redhill in the day, for yet another eye opening (to say the least) experience of this charming little town. You may encounter a fight outside mcdonalds, a 13 year old from Warwick school asking you to buy them cigarettes,or a trail of 11, at a push, 12 year olds with their own little sproglets dressed to the nines in Burberry, and something pink and fluffy. Welcome to Redhill! Have a nice day!