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anti_chav_movement _WRITES "Wednesbury - what can only be called a chav infestation
Often acknowledged as one of the most poor and rancid areas in the country, the West Midlands, like all other deprived areas, is a hotbed for that ever expanding breed known as chavs. Nestled in the middle of this county, forsaken by decent society (once part of Staffordshire until they got sick of it and chucked them out) lies the old mining town of Wednesbury (wenzbry if you’re a chav). Few of ever heard it and few would want to. Once a home to the affluent business owners who gained riches from it’s plentiful coal supply, the closure of the mines (it’s primary source of income) made Wednesbury nothing more than an over spill for Birmingham, declared by the government as one of the top five most deprived areas in the country. Made up of several estates, Wednesbury is home to the single teen moms, drug addicts and petty criminals spawned by pathetic, jobless scrots who got off their lazy, fat arses long enough to procreate a brood of mini mes the size of which would make a catholic proud. The majority of the infestation occurs in the estate of Friar Park, once farm land until a few unruly pikeys decided to settle - therefore creating a hive of chavs (or townies as they were known)which has spread at such an alarming rate, it can only be described as a virus. Controlled by three ruling families (of which EVERY resident of Friar Park belongs to at least one whether directly or by proxy Friar Park is like a bad episode of The Sopranos. With their own code of conduct, Friar Parkers live in their own deluded, chavaliscious bubble rarely venturing out of this safe haven for scutters. In an estate where rule number one is ‘don’t nick off your own - they ain’t got owt’ and carrying Netto bag is ‘a badge of honour’ (That isn’t a lie - it was in an article in the local rag Express and Star - number one for chav gossip), there isn’t much hope for the poor little shits born into it. Whether it’s Wodensborough C.T.C or Manor High, the only qualification the chavlings can expect is an ASBO (or an E grade in woodwork if they’re lucky) We are daily bombarded by images of poor African families on Oxfam adverts, eager to lift themselves out of poverty yet the chavs of Friar Park are quite happy to stay exactly as they are. Their self proclaimed anthem, set to Prodigy’s ‘Firestarter’ is ‘I’m a Friar Parker, a scruffy Friar Parker’ - I think this speaks for itself. Wednesbury is a place where the uniform is trackies tucked into Winnie the Pooh socks, purchased from West Bromwich indoor market and Argos bought/stolen jewellery, where the average age of chav grandparent hood is 32, where aging chavs congregate at local watering hole The Cabin in their legging and slippers, where every week the post office is packed by rioting chavs, all jostling to try and get to the front of the queue to cash their giros so they can go ‘up Ethel Austins and Peacocks and get little Harmony and Kieran new gear’. Now to come to Wednesbury’s ‘nightlife’. For the under age chavs, the fall of evening means heading to the park to get tanked up on whatever the elected chav has managed to steal from the local offie (usually paint stripper vodka or some form of cider). Then, if it’s a special night, it means a trip to Wetherspoon’s where the average age of customers is 14. Full to the brim of teens wearing their best Bladidas (fake adidas), all crowding the bar demanding ‘blue wickeds’ and cider and black, Wetherspoons has become the new hang out for the exiled Patrick goers who were cast out into the cold after the closure of Wednesbury’s one and only nightclub (although I use that word loosely). And of course it wouldn’t be a proper night out without a leisurely joyride round the estate in a stolen Nova, 50 Cent blasting out of the speakers. Choose life. Choose your giro. Choose having 6 kids by the age of 20. Choose Tv’s, stereos, Dvd players (all carefully robbed from Curry’s). Choose poor health, smoking 40 a day from the age of 10, drinking shite cider and black. Choose a council flat. Choose Sport‘s World. Choose fake sovereigns that turn your finger green. Choose wagging school to go to get pissed down the ‘dockey’ . Choose losing your virginity age 12 on the field at the back of the canal. Choose beating the shit out kids from Menzies High School and getting bundled in the back of police riot vans. Choose wedding receptions held at the Legion. Choose appearing on Jeremy Kyle for a paternity test and saying ‘At the end of the day, right’ 20 times a minute. Choose Friar Park.
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Posted by anti_chav_movement on (123 Reads)
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| :: Tamerton Foliot, quant village in Plymouth with a growing problem
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pippy _WRITES "Tamerton Foliot is a small village near two of the chaviest areas in Plymouth; Southway and Whitleigh. Unfortunatetly as the infestation grows around it, it has started growing into it. I have lived there for about 7 to 8 years, and i remember the days when i used to be able to walk up to the school for scouts (about an 8 minute walk) without a worry in the world. A couple of waves here and there from those you knew. There is also a lovely annual carnival.
Though today chavs have bred and thrived within it. When i attempt to walk to the school, or near it, they are everywhere. First there are three pubs in close proximity and there is usually a couple of young pale faced puffter chavs attempting to get alcohol and if it is match day there are loud abusive chants. Next is the post office. A couple of these skinny ones are outside waiting for the 16 year old mate to get them some fags. Inside chavettes flock the magazines and sweets, stealing anything possible. Also they tend to eye up and giggle anything on legs that enters (even to the extent of following you on your daily business when you clearly ignore them). The staff are dimwitted but normal citizens. Unfortunately this is a recipe for disaster with the chavs.
Shop assistant: 'Thats ur'
Chav: 'Whut Lloyd? No I aint fockin gettin you any fags'
Shop assistant: 'one pound eighty-three pence'
Chav: 'A'ight bay'
(hands over cash walks out)
Now quite often they under pay or over pay due to lack of intelligence, then come back an hour later complaining about the money. The shop assistant didnt take any notice and argues back. Thus ending with a banned chav that now waits outside for his mates to buy his stuff. Consequently the shop is now more menacing to walk by...
Having passed chavy gimps on bicycles or the ones outside the chinese, avoiding glances before the big groups of 20 + decide you are threatening them, you get to the school. On the roof, in the field or on the playground they are playing, screwing, scrapping or abusing themselves with drugs. Then during all the parts of the scout group evening (beavers 6-8 years, cubs 8-10, scouts 10-14) they are sad enough to press their faces against the glass and watch. About 2 hours later they might rip their face off of it and shout a few rude words or make abusive gestures. Two minutes later they go off to a park where they screw chavettes or each other.
Though one nice thing thats happened is the police rounds. Now there are 2 policewoman and a policeman that walk about Tamerton, splitting up the crews, stopping the assualts and fining the lads that are buying fags or alcohol. So maybe one day they might back off, or surely they will just keep growing like in keyham or north prospect."
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Posted by pippy on (84 Reads)
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| :: High Wycombe - a Londoner's perspective
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rakmanenuff _WRITES "due to the lack of funds to holiday somewhere exotic like indonesia or comoros, i recently got myself a zone 1-6D travelcard and a few bus/rail tickets to tour the area west of london.
it started off great. slough has the most spendiferous selection of hot chicks. gangs of cute chinese girls, the most awesome-looking filipinas, gorgeous indian girls everywhere, with the non-asian girls equally ravishing.
continuing through scenic towns like henley-on-thames, then heading northwards towards amersham, i thought i was in for a lovely quiet journey through green landscapes and pretty little villages.
then, at the top of the hill just before high wycombe a tall, skinny, druggie-looking chav complete with prototype mannerisms and chavalicious fashion sense entered the bus, greeting the ageing driver with a loud but friendly "safe boss". he continued to harrass the driver with helpful statements such as "come ON, buddy!", "get on with it bruv". i'm not quite sure why this unemployed loafer was in such a hurry, but the driver took no notice of him.
to my surprise the whole place, and it's a pretty hideous-looking place too, was completely infested with these kevs, whether it be the tall skinny druggie variety or the short, neat, slimy-looking ones with chav attitude to match even the most ridiculous essex lads.
what makes high wycombe a chav capital with a difference is the fact that it has retained some of that good ole thing called "ragga".
i saw man-o-man walking the streets in a late 80s stylee, as spotted in lewisham 1989, and there were indications of high wycombe moving up the mixed-race ranking list too. the place may not yet be approaching mixed-race capitals like shottingham or croydon, but it's already there, in SPIRIT.
the white dudes walking around the place reminded me very much of your stereotypical bus-jacking, house-theiving mixed-race skunk dealer found in ladbroke grove during the mid-90s.
so what's stopping high wycombe from being at the very pinnacle of chavdom? well.. please correct me if i'm wrong, but the high wycombe LADIES still have some way to go before they reach the 13-year-old pram-pushing status of the loud, crazy and totally out-of-control chavettes hanging around the run-down pikey shithole that is Tilbury.
"
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Posted by rakmanenuff on (228 Reads)
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