Brierley Hill is epicentre of dole life where shell suite clad obese women of the night parade their back and bum cleavave whilest swapping their milk tokens for weed & amber leaf tobacco.
When not dressed in tracksuits the local female populace favour bras 3 cups too small peeping out of fat oozing boob tubes and denim miniskirts
Barneys playbarn is the local drop in centre for anyone active enough to leave their ps3 alone for 1/2 an hour.
Overcrowding and inbreeding is prevelant where threesomes with your cousin is the norm.
The Wannabe Chav element (they are not even fully fledged chavs) flock here like ants around jam, whence they proceed to revel in their own s**t while decorating their overgrown gardens with dirty nappies.
Jeremy Kyle could not afford to run a programme here as the DNA test list of perspective fathers for the ADHD aflicted, ritilin dosed brood is just too widespread often venturing as far as Pensnett.
The local diet consist of iceland pasties, deep fried nuggets and on dole day Mcdonnalds happy meals all washed down with Frosty Jack cider or panda pop for the kiddies.
90% of these people will live and die within a quarter of a mile of where they were born.
This towns local cash in hand jobs consists of paper rounds, drug running or standing on street corners (right next to the police station)
The queue outside the Venerial Disease clinic to rid yourself of custard D**k is only just shorter than the post office queue on pension day
Where if you have nt Sh****D your mates missus it means there must be a viagra shortage.
Untaxed, uninsured shag vans carrying matresses are the least of your worries here as none of the drivers of them actually possess a driving licence.
On summary, any decent person posessing any moral substance should stay the F**k away or risk horrific flashbacks of this downtrodden community.
Most incomers as the locals call you arrive into Dartmouth via one of the River ferries where you will be met with the best kept town centre wash with art galleries and quaint unique shops, all this with Sir Aston Webbs Naval College sits grandly overlooking the beautifully set postcard image. Dare you creep up the “Hill” into Townstal then the rot starts. The locals despise anyone who earns a decent honest living, the largest employer is the benefits agency who see to all your every needs ensuring your incapacity benefit for your bipolar syndrome keeps you and your ADHD brood of different parentage in spa pasties and panda pop. They shun Sainsbury’s as they don’t sell gas and electric tokens and favour the spar shop which is burgled by the same person every month. The gene pool is rather limited with three generations of inbreeding commonplace with 5 surnames accounting for 90% of the local populace. The rare decent folks house are interspersed with social services cases generally shipped in from Plymouth or Totnes. Drugs are common place along with untaxed cars carrying 6 kids on the back seats, the kids walk to school smoking roll ups mentally preparing themselves for another day learning to write their names in the dirt with a stick in preparation for claiming benefits for bipolar whilst sending their own illiterate children to school so they can get blind drunk on white lightning whilst dreaming up more efficient ways of claiming more benefits. You will never fit in with these people unless you can decorate your garden with ornamental nappies to the annoyance of your decent hard working neighbours. A few locals will be aghast at your ability to converse intelligently with fellow humans, despising you for being happy and content. 90% of these people will live and die within a quarter of a mile of where they were born without venturing into the bright metropolis of Torbay or Plymouth.
It’s almost like deliverance in the modern world.
Enjoy Dartmouth but don’t venture up the hill! Don’t settle here unless you can afford a gin palace on the river! They don’t your fancy book learning ways ruining their lives!!
By: Mick
South Shields has a housing stock that is crumbling from the outside in. Hence it is hard to understand why the town is called “affluent” by Wickipedia. The main industry in South Shields is shoplifting; other than that there is no noticable mean of making a living since there is no industry and few offices.
The education standard of the average Tynesider is measured by their opinion that The Sun is an intellectual newspaper .
The woman in South Tyneside are plainly vicious.
Having lived in most uk regions I can vouch for the fact tht the woman do not like male expression and will take your head off if you have an opinion.
Nasty is the best way to describe Tyneside woman.
The men are generally easy going and you dont get much hassel .The chavs are similarly easy going and if there is any violence it is almot always between families which are huge, owing to in-breeding.
There are more dogs than humans in South Shields and they
are represented as follows:
Pitbull type staffys 80%
Huskies 10%
Little yappy dogs 10%
The shops are full of shiny cheap imports and tynesiders
think that anything that shines or lights up is posh.
I once heard a woman in South Shields talk about class and the conversation is as follows.
Woman 1: I was afraid to come to your house with the other girls for the party because it looks posh from the outside.
Woman 2. Well its not I have dity knickers lying around the house just like anyone else.
In South Shields if you happen to get attacked by someone and report the crime to the police you will be arrested also .
If someone burries an axe in your skull you will be arrested
by the south shields police. This is unless you are an owner of a shop or someone who is wearing a suit .
South Shields is a Police State but the police do not do much except raid the odd house which is growing hashish in the attic. Other than that they pull shop lifters but that is the extent of it.
If you dont like the sea,beach or river then the only reason to want to live in South Shields is because you have learning difficulties.
Verdict : Nasty woman, no decent shops, no social venues, no class.
98% Chav population
By: Adam C
Bridport the historic twat town (it really says it on the sign on the way in) a town that has a bigger cover up rate than area 51. so it may be it says its a historic market town and the people are welcoming like a certain tv series on cbs reality called underbelly bridport has a underbelly a real dark one crime rate is higher than glasgow. and the famous curse of the chav is alive and kicking here. you’ll need a chav translator as all you hear is “bruv bruv innit mush like bruv u wat fam wat u chattin mush” we have three types of chav first the common chav a pain in the ass for society for over a decade and start on you for no reason cuz der bored bruv the turf for these little s**ts is the bus station skilling and dr roberts close aka druggy bolervard then you have the bit more money chino chavs who yankees flat peaks wear jumpers that were knitted by there nans smoke skunk and think they are better than you. the last chav is the agrichav or farmer chavs who turf up the countryside and are loved by the dorset wildlife trust and enviroment agency for greenlaning,dumping cow s**t into streams and burning tyres and bragg on about who has the best tractor oooooo arrrrrrr…. next is the night life come visit the world famous no.10 where you can get the friday night special of punch and a pint with the chavs starting on you with there 14 year old girl friend swimming in the the vomit because half a pint is too much next we move over to h block the famous drug den of this cesspool were fine herbs and purveors of hullcinagenics can be purchased with your hard earned job seekers or income support.
If you are looking to purchase clothing you’ll need the internet as all there is are charity shops which you can get a saville row suit that someone died in. or peacocks as a last resort. cuisine is expensive and undercooked so bring a packed lunch if you are desprite. the town has nothing businesses are closing down due to extortion council rates venture 1 mile out of the town and you have the grotty sleazy wannbe skegness west bay were the potent smell chips burgers from various food sheds “kiosks” that sell food you could get from iceland and the northern exposure appear in the summer months to park dean which is normally flooded and the owner needs to see a therapist. then you have jenson button wannbes in there crappy little 1.0l saxos thinking they are on fast and the furious doing donuts on a mini roundabout and race in a car park that closes at 10 so they piss of the the nearest business park and have nothing better to do than to raise insurance prices. crime is rife stabbings,rapes,suicides my mate was beaten up for no reason dropping of some stuff to a mates house and the police do nothing as everything to them is a civil matter or they cant be bother to do the paperwork. however they can scoff kebabs and arrest the wrong people. like the mazda gt advert there is no alive in this town. I cannot wait to leave this hellhole and hope our estate agent gets us out far out of here. and feel sorry for the people that move in.
By: josh w